November Brain

So, it’s day 15 and I’m deep in the hideous brainswamp of NaNoWriMo. This year seems different somehow. I don’t know if it’s because I only finished a book last month but my inner editor seems to be more critical than usual. It’s been very hard to just let go and write shit, which is sort of the point of NaNoWriMo. Maybe it’s because I never really believed in the point of NaNoWriMo in the first place – it’s a great opportunity to get shit done, but writing a 50,000 word novel in a month? Pffft? Really?

If you’ve got fifty thousand raw, unedited, frantically filled and hopelessly padded words then you’ve got about half a barf-draft, or at least the barf-draft of a novella.

Not that a barf-draft of any length is a bad thing – you can’t do much without raw, unedited brain vomit. Without it you’re just someone with an idea for a novel. Or a ‘concept’, if you want to be a dick about it. But idea, concept, imaginationscape, whatever you want to call it, without actual words you haven’t got a thing.

That’s why I will always love NaNoWriMo.

There are always going to be timewasters, lazy people and people who are just heartbreakingly glad of any kind of attention whatsoever. There will always be nerds, posers, people who don’t know how to use Google and sugar high teenagers writing incomprehensible anime fanfiction. The forums are clunky, the pep talks are teeth-grindingly twee and the actual prize is disappointing – the prize being a 50,000 word braindump of stuff that occasionally reeks of boredom, desperation or both.

Even better, nobody else is going to edit this mess. It’s all down to you.


By the time November is over this prospect is about as alluring as taking a pair of tweezers and dissecting one of your own bowel movements. And so it doesn’t get done. Maybe. Or maybe not. It still gets to you write, and that for me is the whole point. It’s good enough. I’ll take it.

There is also the fun of pointing and laughing at some of the worst writing outside of the TVTropes ‘Writing’ forums, so that’s always good.

The twitter is consistently hilarious. Here’s some choice goodies if you don’t have time to click.

I mean, if Bret Easton Ellis could right a shit ton of pages about a serial killer, there is no reason you can’t!

There is. There really is a very good reason. Although when I think about it, Patrick Bateman fanfic would be a great way to pad your NaNo novel; the boring little bastard could run into thousands of words on Phil Collins alone.

maybe check out Men are from Mars Women are from Venus for gender insight

I admit, I’d be interested to know how this worked out for them.

How do I properly write a “yandere” character?

I don’t know what this means. What does this mean? Does this mean I am now Old On The Internet?

And now for my personal favourite.

Is it possible to inject gnats into the bloodstream via IV?


2 responses to “November Brain

  1. See, now, if the official pep talks were like this, I’d actually read them all the way through.

    (Yandere is mostly a TVTropes thing, a cute anime word for a stalker.)

    • Hello you – nice to see an SA face! I should have known it was a troper thing really, shouldn’t I? All their weird anime monkeycheese vocabulary just becomes so much white noise to me after a while.

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