Fifty Shades Recaps

As you’ve probably noticed, they made a movie of Fifty Shades of Grey. This means that more and more people who didn’t read the books are coming to blogs like these in order to avoid doing so. Perfectly reasonable behaviour, if you ask me.

Below are the links to each Fifty Shades of Grey recap. Fifty Shades Freed and Darker recaps to come later. Enjoy, and may they spare you the pain of reading these truly terrible books.

Chapters 1&2 – Fifty Shades of Shit

Chapter 3 – Are (Boy)Friends Electric?

Chapter 4 – Fifty Shades Drunker

Chapter 5 – The One Where She Gets Kidnapped

Chapter 6 – This Charming Man

Chapter 7 – Say Cheese!

Chapter 8 – Let’s Do It!

Chapter 9 – Deep Bloat

Chapter 10 – Out To Lunch At The Roadkill Grill

Chapter 11 – The Aristocrats!

Chapter 12 – Inconsistent Personality Disorder

Chapter 13 – Point To Schlong

Chapter 14 – “I didn’t know I could dream sex.”

Chapter 15 – No Butt Stuff

Chapter 16 – “I don’t want him to beat me, is that so unreasonable?”

Chapter 17 – Butterflies Do Not Work That Way

Chapters 18-19 – Afternoons and Coffee Spoons

Chapter 20 – The World’s Saddest Dung Beetle

Chapter 21 – Crackwhore Vertigo

Chapter 22 – A Big Bunch of E-Mail Bullshit

Chapter 23 – The Bit Where He Yanks Her Tampon Out

Chapter 24 – I’m Flying, Flying, Flying Over You

Chapter 25 – In Which I Finally Lose My Mind

Chapter 26 – All’ alba vincero!

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